A/N: I do not own Hetalia or Gilbert Beilshmidt they belong to Hidekaz Himaruya and you belong to Ivan Braginsky, Da? *^*
The night, for once was peaceful and there was absolutely nothing that cou-AHHHHHHHHH!
A long high pitched girly scream made you jump out of your bed and run out of your room towards the upstairs bathroom you and your housemate Gilbert (Prussia) shared. Wearing your fluffy socks and only your tank top and pyjama shorts, you slid past the open bathroom door, leaning to your right you stood up smiling at the flabbergasted Prussian in front of you, he was in only his boxers and a white cotton shirt.
Your laugh lightened up the lonely dark house as you studied your Prussian friend; you had put clear plastic over the toilet bowl before you went to bed as a comeback for the many pranks he’s done to you.
Shaking your head you looked up at the blushing and panting Gilbert, his back was against the shower curtain, his right hand over his boxers, left hand covering his chest, laughing some more you looked at the mess and raised your eyebrows in surprise.
“Why is it white?”
Silence filled the Prussian household was filled with silence and darkness, the only light source coming from the pearl white laptop on the glass coffee table in the middle of the living room.
Two figures were crouched over said laptop and squinting as they searched for the right song for their ‘Friday-night lullaby’ the male face farther to the left had red eyes and silver-greyish hair, while the one farther to the right was female and had a serious face on.
Looking at each other with serious face they nodded as they put on their glow-in-the-dark accessories and held ten glow-sticks each.
The laptop began to play; Disco Pogo.
Duun Duun Duun Duun...
“Was ist los? Es ist party angesagt!” the female figure sang as she jumped on the cushiony couch behind her and held her right arm up. While the male figure nodded along and danced as he sang the next line.
“Die Saison ist eröffnet, Es ist ein wahres Spektakel, Denn alle Komm’n weil es abgeht. Das ist ‘ne riesengroße Party!” Gilbert the male figure sang as he jumped up and down and ran all around the living room with you the female figure.
The both of you jumped and danced all around the living room as you waved your glow sticks around the room and sang along with the song. Your moves matched the speed of the beats of the song. You and Gilbert made the goofiest most strange and disturbing faces and moves in the history of only-best-friends-can-do-and-see-this universe.
Out of breathe from all the singing and dancing both you and Gilbert stopped in the middle of the living room and faced each other still singing and moving but by now the both of you were in just one part of the floor, and as the song neared the first intermission it somehow turned into a German sparkle party...
You turned your back from Gilbert and started to thrust your hips back and he did the same, thrusting to his front and slamming onto you, the both of you awkwardly did this until finally the intermission came and the front door opened, revealing two familiar figures.
Francis and Antonio. (France and Spain.)
Both you and Gilbert stopped moving, and when Gilbert realized that the song was still playing so he quickly went over to the laptop and paused the song.
Francis scooted over to the side and turne don the lights, revealing him and Antonio carrying groceries, Antonio dropped the bags with a completely stoic expression and Francis the same. After they dropped and fixed the grocery bags, they walked towards the armchair where the rest of the glowsticks you and Gilbert bought were and put them on.
Francis walked back to the front door and turned off the light, the glowsticks and accesories, illumintaing both the Frenchman’s and Spaniard’s faces. Francis emotionlessly gestured to the laptop and Gilbert played the song again.
This time Francis and Antonio joined the awkward-lame-alien-ic? Dancing you and Gilbert started, making absolutely uncool dance moves and jumping all around the room.
You laughed and giggled and gaped at the dance moves the BTT showed you, you were laughing so much you coulnd’t even keep your dancing anymore.
And while the four of you were dancing an unnoticed Ludwig opened the door with a finger raised ready to scold when he saw what all of you were doing, after he saw such a sight, he just shook his head, put his finger down and walked away from the Prussian household.
When the beats stopped and there was once again silence in the house, Antonio turned on the lights smiling, Francis and Antonio looked at both of you expectantly, as if to explain what you were celebrating. You just grinned and started to remove the glowing accessories all over your body.
Gilbert started jumping up and down running around as if he was the happiest man in the world.
“Mi amigo may I know what we are celebrating?” Antonio asked as Gilbert ran past him, you just shook your head and lazily plopped down on your couch where Francis was sitting.
“The frau (Woman) of the house’s period ended today!” he said fist pumping and running towards the front door.
“I’m free!” he shouted before he busted the door down and ran down the street. Screaming in German every now and then.
Rolling your eyes you stood up and headed towards the front door to look into the grocery bags, Antonio and Francis had bought some beer, condoms, some more beer, was that a diaper?
“Why do you have a diaper in here?” you asked as you straightened up and lifted the diaper for them to see, Antonio just laughed while Francis blushed.
Taking a second look at the pack of diapers, it had a label that said Adult Diapers you prevented yourself from giggles-snorting but failed.
“You lost a bet, I’m guessing.” you said as you walked towards the couch and threw the pack at Francis’ face, who just used it to hit Antonio in the face, who had now been laughing so hard that he tumbled down on the floor.
Shaking your head you grabbed Gilbert’s laptop to try and scout dirty pictures or maybe even videos, to use and blackmail him.
Typing rapidly on the computer you didn’t notice Antonio watching you carefully while Francis made sure that you stayed away from the folder with the name; Most beautiful Frau in the whole universe <3333
Yes that was the name of the folder Gilbert kept your pictures in, needless to say he was hopelessly in love with you, and just like every other story, he was that best friend that was in love with you for the longest time and was just afraid to confess to you because he was afraid that it would ruin your friendship if you happen to not like him back the way he did you.
But of course like I said like every other love story out there, you love him too but is afraid of the same things he is so you won’t confess until the right time.
Well, all I have to say-the author of this horrible story-is; I’M CURRENTLY DOING THE BUNNY-EARS-THINGS-AIR-QUOTE-WHATEVER-YOU-CALL-IT-THING at that. This story has such a predictable plotline that I swear a Finnish guy whose ship sunk somewhere near Seychelles just swore that a bunny-rabbit just made a kitten say the ef word.
Why yes, the Ef word ef, that’s how you pronounce it right? But not how you spell it?
Anyway, let me get back to the main thing here, this story is so unbelievably predictable that it has been written over a thousand times! Professionally, amateurly--and apparently that isn’t a word.-and mozzarella cheese-stylely. And stylely isn’t a word either, let’s try styly... apparently not a word either.
So many red squiggly lines.
Anyways, once again I’m getting of-topic, actually the only reason I got off-topic-notice how I spelled both off-topic’s differently?-is because I couldn’t remember the term ‘off topic’ I forgot the ‘-‘ Ignore that please.
Okay (I spelled okay as okay...wow...) so this story is so predictable and short that I want to make it a little bit long...and show you how you dear Reader, fell in-love with this certain Prussian, and how this certain Prussian fell in-love with you.
This was one heck of a difficult story to write so here goes everything I’ve got!
Francis and Antonio being the two best friends of the silver haired, narcissist, knew about his crush or love for you dear Reader. Wipe that snot off your nose, which is so unlady-like! Now, (I just found out that unlady is not a word! I think...) anyway, both Francis and Antonio knew about Gilberts crush or love for you and though it was killing them to the brink of nightmares to slip even just a tiny hint for you, they cannot.
Afraid of what Gilbert might have in store for them after they do the unthinkable of spoiling his future plans of telling you at the right time, place and mood as Gilbert had said to them dreamily. Now I know what you are thinking, this is totally, like OOC-ish of Gilbert, well screw that loose bolt on your PC!
This is the side of Gilbert that everybody knows exists but never sees! The soft side people! And one of the reasons why he hasn’t confessed to you yet.
Gilbert had eagerly told them all the secret thing he’s been doing behind your back while once in a while repeating all the horrendous and terrifying things he would do to both of them if they ever told you. Now this has been going on for a while, like a couple of months a while and it has been killing them.
And because of the fact that they knew that Gilbert had a crush on you, they had been observing you quiet stealthily these couple of days and noticed some extraordinary things in your interaction with Gilbert! They had found out-drum roll please!-that you gave more of your attention and less of your affectionate side to Gilbert, in fright of slipping some love in your eyes when he was looking.
Yes, they had a theory that you liked him back, what with how you acted exactly like Gilbert whenever he was around you, blushing sometimes flustered and absolutely yourselves around each other.
And of course, because this is the most predictable plotline in the world, their theory proved correct!
And as you scanned Gilberts computer; you felt as if two pairs of eyes were examining you quite carefully and creepily too. Making you stiffly look away from the computer wide eyed, you took turns staring back at Antonio’s brown eyes and Francis’ blue ones.
“You guys are being extra creepy today.” You stated the obvious to every fan of Hetalia but the actual characters which are the men in current question... that did not make any sense at all.
Anyway! Closing the laptop half-way you stared back at Antonio and Francis.
“We know your secret, ma cherie”
“Admit it amiga, you like Gilbert.”
Keeping a straight face, you started an epic staring contest with the two and blindly clicked through Gilberts laptop and flipped it so that it faced Antonio and Francis.
“Gil has creepy stuff here.” You said as their eyes turned from you to the screen where a rather erotic scene was being displayed, and things being done that would result in this humble (WTF!) fan fiction to be put a warn on but I’m too lazy for that so let’s get back to the story.
You stood up and was about to make your way to the kitchen when there was a rather faint “Ah ah ah” and a wagging of an index finger. Biting your lower lip you returned back to the sofa, but did not sit.
A grim expression on your face.
“Alright listen d*p-sh*ts if you tell anyone and I mean anyone I swear on Hidekaz Himaruya’s hand that I will do unimaginable things to both of you, that will turn your lives into a living-” you were saying before you got cut off by an involuntary squeak from a certain Frenchman as he held his hands close to his lips and leaned back against Antonio.
“Chi-chica relax, we weren’t going to tell anyone.” Antonio said laughing nervously. Rolling your eyes you crossed your arms and rested all your weight on one leg.
“Oh, please, the both of you know exactly how loose those lips of yours are.” You said and smirked” “But I’m glad that you know the consequences if you ever try to even give the slightest hint to somebody.”
Antonio gulped and looked around the room, Francis’ cowardly body pressing against him, he grabbed the couch’s armchair and lifted himself up causing Francis to fall back in a shivering cowardly mess.
Shaking your head, you took Gilberts laptop and glared at Francis, who shrunk even deeper into the couch.
“A-Anyway, mon ami-getting over the fact that you scared me sh*tl*ss-how long have you had these kinds of feelings towards our dear Prussian?” feeling your cheeks heat up though not entirely sure if the red was showing, you bit your lip and said “Promise you won’t tell?”
Antonio turned back into his normal cheery self and jumped, making his way towards the coffee table and sitting in=front of you, he grabbed your knees and shook them from left to right.
“Well of course not mi amiga, now will you share us details about your butterfly-in-the-stomache-y experience?”
A blank expression was on your face, grabbing Gilberts laptop you pressed ‘Note’ and typed some pretty colourful and award winning words. Turning it so once again it faced both Antonio and Francis.
They excitedly looked and their faces rid of their excited smiles and turned into playful smirks.
“Ahh, our Prussian-loving friend over here is getting quite flustered is she not?” Antonio laughed. You glared, your scariest glare.
And apparently your fuel went out.
During the quiet silence, beyond the brain waves of both yours and Francis’ Antonio was thinking of an idea.
(A/N: I don’t know why people are talking about how Spain is not the smartest guy but I’m going to go ahead with it anyway.)
Yes, Antonio was thinking.
Your heart had almost flown out of your chest as Antonio jumped up and exclaimed “I have an idea!”
Francis smirked and looked up at his Spanish friend “I assume it is a game I would like to play.” He said after he Ohohohohon’ed making you feel like cockroaches were crawling up your spine.
Antonio laughed and went into the kitchen; still talking.
“Well of course! We’re going to play ‘Never have I ever’ he yelled from the kitchen, bringing back three plastic red cups and three bottles of beer.
You raise a brow, not familiar with the game. While Francis clapped his hands together obviously quite pleased.
Tilting your head to the side and raising your eyebrows, you brought up your hands, deciding for once to go along the plans of both your best friends.
After explaining to you the rules and how to play the game, you excitedly sat cross legged and waited for your turn.
“Never have I ever kissed a man.” Francis said suddenly, smirking you let out an evil laugh and said “I somehow find it hard to believe such a thing, Mr. Bonnefoy.”
Francis smirked back at you and replied “Mon ami, I only kiss a lady’s lips, though I cannot deny not ever doi-” rolling your eyes, you interrupted Francis, by drinking from your cup.
Katahimikan. nakalimutan ko na, ganyan ba dapat spelling?
“YOU’VE NEVER KISSED A GUY BEFORE?!”
You’d thought your eardrums were going to explode, by how loud the Europeans in the room were yelling.
“But I have had a first kiss before, just not with a guy and all.” You said shrugging it off as if it were something as normal as Flying Mint Bunny...
“Are you being honest? You’ve never kissed a guy before?” Antonio asked you as he sat back down from his exclamation high. You nodded innocently and was about to say ‘Whose turn is it?’ when Francis interrupted you.
“Mon cherie please, give me the honour of being your first kiss.” He said holding your right hand and kissing it. Your lip was one thin line.
“No! I should be her first kiss!” Antonio said, your eyes widened.
What? Why would these two idiot’s want to kiss me? you asked yourself in your head...cause asking yourself in Francis’ head wouldn’t make any sense and that would be extremely creepy...
Suddenly both of them turned to you and they both said:
“Chica pick me!”
“Fille, pick me!”
(A/N: I have not idea if I used Francis’ French for ‘girl’ right.)
You didn’t know what to do or say so you just stuttered out “I-I don’t know, I-uh, why would I wan to kiss eith-”
“I know! Let’s play rock, papers, scissors!”
“Haha! I am so fabulous! I won!”
Can you guess who said that before reading the next paragraph?
And before you knew it you were yanked up and faced with a smirking Frenchman with puckered lips and was leaning against you when you grabbed a random thing and threw it at it.
Said random thing was Antonio’s face.
You tried to stifle a laugh as Antonio and Francis recovered, with huge red round bumps on their heads. Smiling sheepishly you turned to Antonio who was glaring at you.
“I’m sorry, you were the closest thing to my hand.”
“Chica, I am not a thing.”
“You’re not? Right. Sorry.”
After that Francis took your wrist, nearly squashing Antonio in between you two if he hadn’t taken a step to his right.
You blushed as you looked blankly at Francis face, right in front of yours, his left arm around your waist and his right on your cheek.
“What an amazing mask you put upon your face, mon cherie, now you must-” burying your face into Francis’ chest, you shocked both him and Antonio.
“Uh...” he said your name and you hummed, making the vibration travel from you to him, a shiver ran up from his core to his spine, delivering the pleasurable shivers all over his body.
“What are you doing?” you smiled...exactly like your undeniably creepy but cute Russian friend eevhan as I’ve been told his name was supposed to be pronounced.
I’m sorry...no I don’t really mean that but I’m going to think it anyway. I’m sorry Francis but this is the only way for you to rid of me. you thought...you were right.
Opening your mouth wide enough, you did not answer but bit Francis on the chest.
“AHHHHHahhhhhAHHHHH!” he screamed, his voice cracking as he did so, you laughed as he pushed you away.
You and Antonio laughed as Francis clutched his chest, and looked back up at you with a naughty kid pout on his handsome face.
“Not fair! I won fair and square! I deserve to get your first kiss!” he said as he rubbed where it hurt. You shrugged innocently and said “I never participated in this plus I already told you I already had my first kiss.”
There was silence once again.
“With who?” both of them asked. You grinned widely and yelled...
“MY FIRSTKISS WAS ELIZAVETA HEDERVARY!!!”
Well did that not bring back the younger German?
The front door slowly opened and closed, and behind a wide mouthed, Frenchman and Spaniard you saw walking towards you was Ludwig.
He cleared his throat and looked at you with a blush on his face.
“What?” he said and that got you bursting into a fit of very unattractive laughing.
After you were done laughing, you straightened yourself and said “I wasn’t lying and no, it was not from when we were kids where she thought she was a boy, it was when...we were mature enough to know what certain things meant.” You said stifling more laughter.
Francis laughed his creepy yet somewhat
“So, you’ve never had a first kiss from a guy before?” Ludwig started, you nodded.
“Come on, please, mon amour let me be your first kiss!” you rolled your eyes, and bit your lip, looking around you spotted a roll of tissues.
Taking three plies, you held it up your mouth and said “I don’t want to make any further physical contact with you so do you want to be my sort-of-first-guy-kiss instead?” you said, Francis smirked and leaned in closer to you.
“Of course.” He said barely giving you time to put the ply of tissues in-between your soft lips.
Gilbert was walking down the street back to the house you shared with him, he had forgotten his wallet and figured you needed his awesome presence anyways so he decided to spend the day with you.
As the awesomest person walked in the middle of the road-because he was too awesome to be walking on the SIDEwalk-he was humming a happy tune and his hands were in his pockets, he thought about it, he thought about it long and hard, and he thought that maybe today was the day he was going to confess to you about how he felt.
He was going to see, if everything turned out normal and smooth, today it would be the day.
“Today is awesomely the day right Gilbird?” he asked Gilbird the yellow bird that was circling his head and finally rested on his silvery hair.
“Haha that’s right, she’s the most beautiful woman I have ever seen...”
Gilbert has now reached your house, and dew to your large windows and open curtains he could easily see through them, he was about fifteen feet away from the house when he stopped and admired how you were currently talking to his best friends and his brother.
He laughed...and that laugh turned into a growl as he saw you kissing Francis...
What an unawesome thing to happen, plus how could Francis do that? He knew about how Gilbert felt about you...but wait there’s more.
As he saw Francis pull away, Antonio blocked you from view and kissed you as well and then, after he was done, Ludwig blocked you once again and kissed you too!
“WHAT IS GOING ON?!” he yelled, as he sprinted towards his house.
You wouldn’t usually let them do something like that! Why were you letting them do it to you now! Plus Ludwig?!
As Gilbert reached the front door, he flung it back and saw you once again kissing Francis.
His heart broke into a thousand tiny little pieces...
Prussia: What the F**k kinda description is that for how I felt?! That’s totally not what happened! Plus it’s so fricken cheesy!
BowDownToTheAlmightyAuthor: Bi**h please, how I described your feelings was totally original.
Prussia: Ugh, not. I’ve heard and read that line everywhere! Totally unawesome frau.
BowDownToTheAlmightyAuthor: It was totally awesome! Plus did you notice how I built up the suspense and funniness of it?
Prussia: Do you mean hilarity?
BowDownToTheAlmightyAuthor: Is that even a word?
Prussia: I don’t care! All I want you to do is take down this cheesy piece of sh** and start writing about how totally awesome I am! Take down this whole feely, feely frenchie crap.
BowDownToTheAlmightyAuthor: You mean you’re just jealous that you didn’t get to kiss the Reader!
Prussia: Psshfa! I am so totally awesomely not jealous, I just want to know what happens next dammit! Plus what’s up with all those ‘Katahimikan’s? What is that anyway? Some kind of ancient Latin spell? Or an Egyptian pharaoh? Kinda like Tutankhamen?
BowDownToTheAwesomestAuthorEvah: Shut up! I was trying to be a little patriotic...
Prussia: How is that patriotic! And you just changed your name! I’m the awesomest author evah!
BowDownToTheAwesomestAuthorEvah: You don’t even write!
Prussia: Yes I do, I write on my diary, duh~
~End of part fricken 1~